Benny Lichtenwalner

Our standards

Short answer: This site publishes a real coaching method built on one principle: it works because it stops you from manipulating — the begging, the pressure, and the games. Client privacy is protected by strict anonymization, data is reported with honest denominators, and when pursuing an ex would be bad for you, we say so.

Not a manipulation manual

The method published here is not about tricking anyone into coming back. No-contact isn't a mind game — it's the period where you become genuinely okay, which is the only version of you an honest reconciliation can be built on. If the strategy and the honest thing ever conflict, this site tells you to do the honest thing.

When we tell you not to try

If the relationship was abusive, if pursuing it keeps you stuck, or if what you actually need is to grieve and move on — the right answer is no, and Benny says so, to readers and paying clients alike. Seethe answers library for the situations where the advice is "don't."

Client privacy

A note on mental health

This method assumes heartbreak, not crisis. If you haven't been sleeping or eating for weeks, or you're having thoughts of harming yourself, a licensed therapist comes before any coach — and before any of this. In the U.S., call or text 988 (Suicide & Crisis Lifeline). This site is coaching content, not medical or psychological treatment.

How this site is written

Every page is authored by Benny Lichtenwalner with AI-assisted drafting from his coaching materials, and reviewed by him before publishing. "Updated" dates change only when the substance of a page changes.